Well it has been a good week at our house…..YES we are adjusting to the new normal. It is hard at times…….I see glimpses of the difficulties that Curt will have down the road. He has such difficulty spelling, and he was always the best speller in the house!! Typing has also become an difficult process for him. Things like that drive home the reality of what is to come. But for now we are focusing on the present.
I heard this quote the other day;
“Yesterday is History, Tomorrow a Mystery, Today is a Gift, That’s why it’s called the Present.
That really seems to fit our attitude!
This verse also seems to capture our hope for an unknown future;
Matthew 6:34 says “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own” (NIV)
We are making the choice to not focus on the worries of tomorrow, sure we are planning for them, but not focusing on them. And as any woman over 40 with wacky hormones and emotions knows that can be difficult at times. 🙂
So back to my story of how did we know something was wrong with Curt. I had started it in this post in case you missed the first post.
After the chaos of a busy baseball season for Tyler, a track season for Madi and the end of the school year for Curt and I….. the dust began to settle and the slower pace of summer evolved! It was a welcome reprieve for us. But it was during the dog days of summer that Curt’s deficiencies became more evident.
We took a memory making trip to Omaha, NE where Tyler played baseball in a tournament and we were able to attend the College World Series Championship games both nights. It was a great trip for Tyler since he aspires to play college baseball!
But as we headed through security at a busy Baltimore airport on the morning of the trip, Curt had trouble. He didn’t take off his belt, didn’t take off his shoes, or take out his money clip. It was like he just didn’t get what to do. He held up the line, made people mad and didn’t really seem to notice the commotion he had caused. But I did. Also on that trip I ended up driving a great deal since he was unfamiliar with the highways in Nebraska and driving proved to be a challenge for him.
Another eye opener to a medical problem was when Curt took my sports minded son to the Dr. to see if he had truly broken his finger while diving for a ball in centerfield during a baseball game. Curt returned from the Dr with the good news that the finger was not broken. Only to find out later that is was broken!
But come August I became increasingly concerned….I attended an in-service with Curt and saw how he had trouble keeping up with what we were learning. I also noticed his once proficient typing skills deteriorating rapidly. He seemed more apathetic and could not accomplish as much around the house as previously. He kept messing up setting his clock radio alarm and had difficulty using the computer. He also had great difficulty learning anything new. Most people would not have been aware of anything, but a wife sees these changes. I then decided to email his Dr. to express my concerns, Curt had an annual physical in late August and I wanted the Dr. to know what I was seeing.
I became more worried, concerned and anxious about him. Soon I began to have great difficulty sleeping at night, and with in 2 weeks time lost 10 lbs, just like that! (So if you are looking for a good weight loss program, anxiety and worry seemed to work pretty well for me!)
So when he talked with his family Dr. in late August and he ordered an array of tests, I was not surprised when his MRI came back fine, and his blood work also came back fine. I just had a sinking feeling all along that dementia/alzheimer’s was what we were dealing with, even with NO family history of it!
When a neuropsychologist confirmed a diagnosis of dementia I was emotionless, I had already come to grips with what was happening to my dear husband! I really thought I would throw up when they told me, but when the moment came, I just thought to myself, ” I knew it, I knew it!”
And on that day Oct. 1st began the first day of living with our new normal.
I will write more later, I have one amazing story to tell of God really providing for us last week!! But alas, I am getting ready to head off to Tyler’s basketball game, and finish some last minute Christmas shopping……yes life with two teens at home….life does go on!
Jesus and Dark Chocolate 
Sandy… how did I NOT know this??? I haven’t been reading blogs lately… but I didn’t notice on facebook…. Girl.. I’m going to be praying for you all…You’re amazing!!
Hey. Thanks for sharing more about life. I love you. 🙂
Dear Sweet One.
I sat here moaning about my petty irritations with My Man all day long and am brought quickly to reality after reading your post. I am so thankful that you are relying on God. Continuing to pray for you, your beautiful children and of course, your man.
Hugs.
Sooz
You are planning for the future, but not focusing on it. That is such a good thing! The truth is, none of us knows what will happen to us even 5 seconds into the future. It is all under God’s sovereign control anyway. We just think we know what our future’s will look like.
(I remember when my husband got his terminal diagnosis at 32….I read a quote from a man that was dying that said this, ” We are all dying. It’s just that some of us realize it.” That sounds morbid, but it was very freeing to us. The point being that each of our futures are in God’s hands–none of our days are a surprise to him.) God loves Curt, more than anybody–he is HIS child. He will see him through, no matter what the future holds.
Thanks for posting Sandy, We love you guys!
You and Curt popped into my mind yesterday during silent prayers at church… if you ever just need to let loose… please know you can…and I won’t even blink and eye!
I hope you are able to sense some peace in this meaningful week!
Blessings…
still lifting you all up in prayer. Is it ok with you if I mention you to my moms in touch group? let me know via inbox at FB…thanks….if i already asked this please forgive…..
I see God’s strength shining through you. My heart continues to ache for you.
I had the same sort of reaction to my sister’s diagnosis; it just confirmed what I suspected!
I hope this Christmas is especially sweet for all of you!
BTW, I LOVE these pics of the two of you! What a sweet couple!
I am in awe of your strength. You have handled this amazingly well. May you continue to feel God’s strength during this difficult season. Hugs to you my friend!
Sandy,
You are certainly standing up as a strong woman of God. My heart aches, aches, aches when I read the signs you saw. But I’m so glad you didn’t delay for a couple years before you did something about it. God has your whole family in the palm of his hand. You have so many praying for your strength and I know you will continue to do well, even when that means taking breaks and letting others take care of things for you.
Love you, sweet friend,
Lisa
Wow Sweetie What an amazing share for all of us, thanks for being sooo open. I am new to your post by way of Mimi’s blog.. And I will surely be sending up prayers for You, Curt and family..
You are an Awesome woman of God and His ways…
Merry Christmas~~~
May our Sweet LORD cover You with blessings while you seek Him in this, His beautiful season.
Isn’t it magnificent knowing He is the Reason for every Season…I’m sooooo very blessed that He directed me to such Beautiful Blogging Sister’s ..Truly, it sooooo warms my heart……Hugs Dena
You are an amazing Godly woman! I stumbled upon your site looking for a dump cake recipe I was trying to make. I am so sorry to hear of your husbands illness. I will be praying for you and checking in to see how things go!!! I love you your quote at the beginning. Such a great reminder. 🙂
May GOD bless you precious one.
Sandy…just wanted to let you know I am praying for you and your family. So appreciated the verse you shared in this post and the pictures of you two are fabulous!
Sandy, just stumbled upon site from Connies BD was not aware of situation, your in our prayers if you need anything as you journey through this – reach out – and recieve- I know thats always hard but that too is a journey- anything I can do would love to help. Can hubby still work ? Love you thanks for sharing- what an inspiration of Gods working
in your lives Praise HIm,
In Christ
Julia Jay
These posts are so interesting and insightful and it does remind me to keep praying for you! You and your family come to mind frequently. Merry Christmas to you all! Sounds like you are planning to enjoy a wonderful holiday. Blessings!
Dear Sandy, please know that you have a prayer warrior here on Maui. I just came back from my visit to my family in the Philippines to check on my mom’s situation. She too has dementia. My dad is the primary care giver. It’s not an easy situation, but with much love everything i possible and God will give you the strength. When I pray for my mom and my dad, I will also be praying for you. I will visit your blog more often. Keep us posted. We are here to support you.
Liza