My dear daughter came to me the other day devastated and distraught. At first she was so upset she did not even want to tell me what was bothering her. Eventually the emotions of despair began to spill out. The Inventor is 10, almost 11, and she is just now starting to develop. It’s not quite time to rush out and buy that first bra, but the time is drawing near. The Inventor is not happy that this is happening to her body at all! She is a bit of a tomboy and sports girl so this kind of thing is not settling well with her. She even went so far as to make what I thought was a bizarre, impulsive comment about the whole experience. ” I wish I could just grow boobs in Haiti!” She blurted out towards the end of our conversation. Trying to hold back my laughter, in my calmest, kindest mom voice I asked her what she meant?
And it was at that moment I caught a glimpse of her dear heart. She went on to explain that in such a poor country like Haiti they don’t care if someone is growing boobs. They have so many other concerns…like finding food to survive, and shelter to protect them, the girls would be less concerned with what is happening to their bodies. She was right. She went on to explain how their priorities down there are quite different from ours in the U.S. So after much continued discussion about the dreadful acknowledgment that she is in the midst of puberty, we decided to have a “CSBD.” I’ll let you try to guess what it stands for, I will tell you the “S” stands for stupid. 🙂
So we are head out this Saturday for “CSBD,” we are going to Panera Bread for breakfast, and I am bringing my laptop so we can access their cool wireless service, and she can show me her “house” at Millsberry ( One of her favorite websites). Then we are planning to walk around our incredibly quaint town and do a little shopping, and then head down to our local tourist attraction, the oldest pretzel factory in the U.S. It will be a fun mother/daughter time…….and some needed bonding time. I want her to know that I am standing with her through her tough times. I have told her, I can’t fix/change her difficulties, but I can walk with her through these tough times. And I ultimately remind her that God is the potter and she is the clay, and He is forming her into the Godly women he wants her to be. And sometimes, it’s difficult, but God has a plan for her! She even brought up the Matt Redman song, “Never Let Go,” and seemed to be comforted ( somewhat) by the fact that God NEVER lets go.
I am hoping (praying) times like this lay the foundation for communication between the 2 of us during those teenage years, that are coming soon. That precious mother/daughter relationship is a treasure that should be cared for, nurtured, and protected through the years.
Never Let Go
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
Your perfect love is casting out fear
And even when I’m caught in the middle of the storms of this life
I won’t turn back
I know You are nearAnd I will fear no evil
For my God is with me
And if my God is with me
Whom then shall I fear?
Whom then shall I fear?Chorus:
Oh no, You never let go
Through the calm and through the storm
Oh no, You never let go
In every high and every low
Oh no, You never let go
Lord, You never let go of meAnd I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on
A glorious light beyond all compare
And there will be an end to these troubles
But until that day comes
We’ll live to know You here on the earthChorus:
Yes, I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on
And there will be an end to these troubles
But until that day comes
Still I will praise You, still I will praise You
Jesus and Dark Chocolate 
Such good words and a wonderful song for me this morning after days of feeling so awful.
I will be praying for your time with your daughter tomorrow. May the Lord orchestrate time for some precious memories to be made and that foundation indeed be built for a strong future through the teenage years.
I’m right there with you with my 12 and 9 year old daughters.
Wow, Sandy! How blessed she is to have a mom like you to guide her through this! It’s so encouraging that she’s depending on the Lord to never let her go.
And thanks for your comment on my blog today 🙂
You are a wonderful mom and I am sure that with this attitude you will the best friend of your daughter until she is 100!!!!! It is great to “meet” this kind of people and the way your daughter thinks is brilliant and pure!!!
You and I parent so much the same Sandy. I remember going through this time too with my girls. Stay close to your sweet baby girl and I know she will always confide in you. My girls are 21 and 19 and we are so close. I know they don’t tell me every single thought they have, but we can read each other like a book. You know what I mean?
I will be praying for your daughter during this time. And have a lovely weekend just the two of you!
And this song is wonderful. I have another blogging friend going through a time right now so I am going to copy and paste it for her, if that’s okay.
Love that song!
Gid bless you at this time. I know that she will be okay with a mom like you to guide her through. 😉
I meant to say “God Bless you” and not “Gid” so sorry, dear!
I am reading an excellent book called Your Girl: Raising a Godly Daugher in an Ungodly World” by Vicki Courtney. It is excellent! ALso, for preteen girls there is a series called the Young Women of Faith series with fiction books that are about a girl named LIly and nonfiction books that have topics to match what lily is going through. I bought the one called The Beauty Book and The Body Book (all about their changes they will face as puberty hits). There are scriptures included too and I highly recommend them. My oldest and I had many discussions when reading them. And the ficiton books are alot of fun! Have fun on your mother/daughter outing!
Growing from girl to woman IS an unsettling time! She is blessed to have a mom like you!! May the Lord give you the words to encourage your daughter as she blossoms!
Good thing she will be learning how to emotionally handle the changes in her body now, they don’t stop after puberty. Giving her a sense of self will help her through pregnancy and that awkward post season that sometimes never seems to go away. Not that you as a momma want to even think that far away. Bless her heart, it is getting harder in our soceity. I love what she said! I wish America was less concerned about vaniety as well. I don’t have girls so I may never know. And for the life of me I can’t figure out what your acronym stands for! 🙂 Enjoy your date with your daughter!
Love and appreciate this post a lot! So much going through my head and heart that I can’t express in words..but this definitely touched me 🙂 ….
Ok……..”CSBD” stands for Celebrate Stupid Boobs Day! 🙂 I decided we needed to have a little fun with the whole thing.
And thanks to Faith, I went out and bought “The Body Book” by the Women of Faith. Great Suggestion!!!
i came over to say thanks for the comment. you made me smile and laugh. and then the song totally ministered to me. thanks
bless your girls heart. you did wonderful being there to support her.
Very sweet post! As the mom of all boys puberty seems to be a different experience. Your daughter is very blessed to have you through this time!
Blessings,
Shera