I witnessed such a sad event this past weekend. And as I get ready to embark on another baseball tournament weekend, I just felt the need to write about it.
SportTman ‘s baseball team has done very well in their inaugural season, they have won 5 of the 6 tournaments they have played in. For the parents, it’s been busy, but it has been thrilling to see these boys rise to the challenge set before them and play hard to win. They have comeback to win many of their games.
They are 13 year old boys, and they are still playing for the love of the game, sure they are hard on themselves when they strike out, or cause an error, but the passion for the game of baseball is still what drives them.
This weekend I witnessed what can happen when that anger and passion is not directed in the right manner. When a player has not learned to lose well, when he has not grappled with learning the concept of self-control.
As our team was going to shake hands with the other team after we just beat them in the championship game, one of their boys, tackled our catcher, shoved him to the ground and started punching him in the face and head!!!! Thankfully the coaches and the umpires jumped in and took control of the situation, and thankfully our catcher was not injured, just shaken up.
So what causes a 13 year old boy to punch another baseball player?
What causes a boy to have a total lack of respect for another person and wants to hit someone instead of shaking hands?
Are we doing a good job of teaching our kids to lose well? Do they understand that losing is part of the game?
Are players and coaches so consumed with winning that playing the game is forgotten?
We all make mistakes, and it’s ok to fail at something. I sometimes think we want kids to be happy all the time, so they never learn to work hard through tough times. Those times will make them a better person, but it’s hard…..and that is ok. They learn to develop good character by dealing with self control, losing, hard times and failing occasionally. I always ask my kids when they make a mistake, “What did you learn from this?”
What do you think???
Jesus and Dark Chocolate 
That is so sad. I think there is so much pressure on teams to win at all costs. Winning is the goal is the message that seems to be what’s being passed on. When you have some parents who fight with refs and other parents what example are we setting for our children? It’s such a huge issue happening everywhere it seems. A young hockey player here in Canada started a major brawl and the coach encouraged kids to get in there and fight. These were 8 year olds.
A kid did this to my son after a basketball game. It was an important playoff game. My son was the leading scorer on his team but the opposing team won anyway. My boy is not a dirty player — he was just doing great that night. Apparently this made the other kid angry and he, totally unprovoked, attacked my son after the game, even though his team won!These were 9 and 10 graders. And none of the officials saw, so the bully still got to play in the championship game with no penalty at all. This same kid had flipped a parent off from the floor, lots of parents saw but not the refs. If that had been my son, I don’t care what the coach or officials would have done, I would have pulled my own kid out. Totally unacceptable and very sad.
I think the problem begins at home. Many parents are schlepping their kids to so many outside activities (at least where we live) that there is a lot of stress on the children. Plus the fact that many (unsaved) parents just don’t instill those values, respect, other character traits into their children’s overall learning.
I also think the problem then comes from the coaches. Very sad what you witnessed.
Sandy, This is such a sad story. I don’t understand how 13 year olds can be in such a “place” as to have that kind of anger in their lives. Or, that they place such importance on winning or losing a ball game. I imagine most of the problem starts at home.. but, then again, I find that sad, too. All I know to do is pray, pray, pray for these children.